A bride recently posted a question on Wedding Wire about choosing an appropriate song for her Honors Dance with her Father. Joy L. asks: I probably don't really need to worry about this, but I need some reassurance that my choice of song for this dance is appropriate. I was thinking of using I've Got You Under My Skin by Frank Sinatra, because my father and I used to sing the first few lines to each other when I was very little, and I wanted a song that would be meaningful to me and my dad, but I don't want a traditional sappy I-love-my-daughter-and-she-grew-up-too-fast song. I decided to listen to the rest of the song, and when I listen to lyrics I really listen to them and take in their full meaning. I don't know if anyone else listens to lyrics like that. Some of the lyrics in that song say things (or at least they do to me) that could be taken the wrong way. Will guests be listening to lyrics, or am I worrying over nothing? Like I said I probably don't need to be worrying about this, but I am and it is going to drive me nuts until I know whether or not I'm a freak. I feel embarrassed that I am even asking this.The Lyrics:I've got you under my skin I've got you deep in the heart of me
So deep in my heart, that you're really a part of me
I've got you under my skin
I've tried so not to give in
I've said to myself this affair never will go so well
But why should I try to resist, when baby will I know so well
That I've got you under my skin
I'd sacrifice anything come what might
For the sake of having you near
In spite of a warning voice that comes in the night
And repeats, repeats in my ear
Don't you know you fool, you never can win
Use your mentality, wake up to reality
But each time I do, just the thought of you
Makes me stop before I begin
'Cause I've got you under my skin
Our response: You have a hard choice here. You have sentimental attachment to this song but 3/4 of the lyrics are really not relevent to a Father/Daughter relationship. Ultimately the decision is up to what makes you happy. However, with some searching you might find a song you and your dad can be comfortable AND excited about. From our professional experience, our clients have chosen songs where the lyrics were appropriately describing the relationship and if there were any questionable lyrics they were edited out or they played the instrumental version of the song. Another creative way you could use the song is to incorporate your favorite stanza into your or your father's speech at the reception. After all, it's still a warm and sweet memory to share with your guests!
To me, the only way to spin the lyrics to make them appropriate to a Daddy/Daughter dance would be to imply that Daddy can't resist spoiling his daughter so he's going to lose the power struggle because she's Daddy's little girl. Cutesy as that may sound, I don't think that is a very positive way to paint the bride. Does anyone else have a positive spin on these lyrics that we could offer up to the bride?
